


Forever Yours

by Jencala



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Afterlife, Alternate Universe - Afterlife, Angst, Bisexual Male Character, Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Gay Male Character, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, What happens after they die?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 15:41:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17327795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jencala/pseuds/Jencala
Summary: The Battle at the Ministry changed everything and nothing. What comes next is a familiar tale, but so different for the emotions involved. Learning to feel whole again when part of your soul is missing is difficult, but with the right person helping everything will work out in the end.





	Forever Yours

**Author's Note:**

> Special thank you to my beta's Grimyoufuck and DrayPotter. I love you both so much!
> 
> This fic was inspired by a Tumblr ask I received speculating what happens canonically in the afterlife with Remus choosing either Tonks or Sirius to be with. It was supposed to be a short head canon but somehow ended up as almost 8k words. I hope you enjoy it! Get the tissues ready...

Remus was devastated when Sirius died.  He had already lost him once when he thought him a traitor for twelve years in Azkaban, but this—this was permanent.  Remus knew there was no coming back from The Veil and as he met Sirius’ eyes for the last time as he fell backwards through the fluttering shroud he felt something inside him break.  It took everything he had to hold Harry back and not rush after Sirius himself. A soundless scream tore from his throat as he watched the love of his life disappear behind the flickering curtain and he clung to Harry as much to stop him from doing something foolish as to hold himself up in his despair.

He’d never forget his last glimpse of those storm-cloud grey eyes; the apology and love he saw there would be etched in his mind forever.

After the battle was won and the injured seen to, Remus found himself back at Grimmauld Place with no idea how he got there.  He stood in the entrance of the guest room he and Sirius shared not knowing how to walk inside. He glanced at the unmade bed, his eyes immediately looking away from where the shirt Sirius had slept in the night before was carelessly crumbled into a ball against his pillow. 

He forced himself to take a step past the threshold, his chest tightening as he took in Sirius' pack of cigarettes on the bedside table next to the the hairbrush Remus used to brush Sirius' hair out.  It soothed Sirius to have Remus run the brush slowly through his hair at night and it allowed Remus to indulge his long-held fascination with the soft ebony locks. Remus took in a shaky breath, not realizing he'd been holding it in since he'd stepped inside the room and he felt the chasm in his chest deepen and begin to crack.

Sinking onto the mattress as his knees gave out, Remus sucked in another pained lungful of air and had enough presence of mind to wave the wand, clutched white-knuckled in his hand, towards the door, shutting and silencing it before he threw it, for once not caring where it landed.  His vision swam as the tears that had been threatening to fall since witnessing Sirius'...  _ disappearance  _ started to fall.  He clutched at the sheets beneath his fingers, trying to control the tide of emotions swirling inside him, but he couldn't hold back the rage. 

The guttural scream that tore from his throat surprised even him; clawing its' way out of the depths of his soul as his hands ripped at the sheets beneath him, tearing the fabric easily in his anger.  How could Sirius be gone, now, only two years since he'd gotten him back? He'd just held him in his arms the night before, soothing him after another of his frequent nightmares after twelve years in hell, making love to him until just before dawn and trying to ground him in the present. 

He'd kissed that skin, still sweet despite how it clung to his now too-thin frame.  He had whispered words of love into Sirius' ear and heard the same sentiments echoed back to him in the deep, raspy voice he loved so much.  They'd clung to each other just last night, trading lingering kisses, soft caresses that turned desperate as they reclaimed each other once again.  They yearned to forget the war around them and the years of forced separation that still ached inside them both.

They were both painfully aware of the turbulent time they were once again in and had lived through too much war, loss, and betrayal to ever take any of their moments together for granted again.  Yet Remus had still never imagined that the night before would have been their last.

The anger that filled him at the unfairness of it all was like nothing he'd ever felt.  His screams threatened to pierce even the strongest of silencing charms he had warded the room with. He wanted to throw things, break them, watch them smash into infinite pieces against the old plaster of the house that his lover had been trapped in for too much of his short life. He picked up the hairbrush and flung it without looking, a small part of him rejoicing when he heard glass shatter.  Standing he crossed to their dresser and howled as he swept everything to the floor.

The image of Sirius' body falling backwards through the Veil, his eyes begging Remus for forgiveness in leaving him once again, burned in his mind's eye and his rage intensified, flinging the drawers open and all but ripping them from the dresser.  The splintering sound they made as they each hit the floor, their contents scattering everywhere, did little to soothe the growling beast in his chest. 

The need to tear the entire world down around him, to bite, to claw, to destroy it all as the grief consumed him burned in his veins...He'd never felt the wolf this close to the surface so far from a moon.

He took a heaving breath and looked down for something else to destroy and resemble the decimated fragments of his heart and his eyes spotted a flicker of movement under the clothing at his feet.  Curiosity had him bend and pick it up and he at once regretted it. He tried to swallow past the lump in his throat as he looked at the photograph from so long ago; four boys dressed in their Gryffindor finest, arms flung around each other and grinning towards the camera.  Remus collapsed back onto the bed, clutching the picture in his shaking hands as the tears fell down his face freely. 

There was James, dark hair messy and further ruffled by the wind blowing all their scarves behind them, his glasses slightly askew, but his grin huge and infectious as he looked among his friends then at the photographer.  Peter stood to James's right, slightly shorter and chubby, but full of his youthful handsome vitality, trying to mess up James' hair further and Remus could almost hear his laughter echo from the picture. 

Remus saw himself just to James' left, one arm around Prong's shoulder and the other drawing Sirius close to his other side, his younger self’s smile growing even wider as Sirius pressed a kiss to his cheek and then winked at the camera.  His breath hitched as he remembered the day this photograph was taken, Lily at the other side of the lens, telling her boys to smile as they celebrated their last day of exams in seventh year. He could recall the sun shining down on them, but not even touching the warmth in his chest at being surrounded by those he loved best.

What had become of that happy little family he'd been part of tore at his heart.  Three dead, one their betrayer, and he, Remus, the only one still left.

He couldn't stop the sobbing once it began and he set the photograph down almost reverently, so as not to destroy the proof that he, that  _ they _ , had all once been so happy before it had all gone so horribly wrong.  He turned to bury his face in his pillow, but instead ended up clutching the shirt that Sirius had just taken off that morning, his lingering scent permeating every fiber of Remus' being, threatening to consume him.

He buried his nose in the worn fabric, inhaling the combination of leather, tobacco, and citrus that was uniquely Sirius. His heart shattered once more at the realization that soon he wouldn't even have that lingering scent to comfort him.  It would be gone just as Sirius now was.

Remus had no idea how long he laid there, clutching Sirius' shirt, alternating between anguished screams begging to understand why and how this could happen, whispered sobs of Sirius' name, but he knew an exhausted sleep must have eventually claimed him.  When he next became aware, a gentle hand was rubbing his back and he blinked dazedly at the face above him. 

For a moment the concerned grey eyes looking back at him gave him pause, his breath hitching until he took in the purple hair and nose piercing.  "Dora."

"Oh, Remus..." Her soft smile, full of misery and concern, couldn't permeate the grief that he fought to hold back.

His eyes flickered to the door as he sat up, Sirius' shirt still clenched in his hands. "H-how did you get in here?"

She shrugged and settled next to him, her hand still rubbing soothing circles on his shoulder.  "I'm an Auror, there's very little that can keep me out of a locked room if I want inside."

He nodded not knowing what to say.

"No one had seen or heard from you since... yesterday and I figured I'd find you here."

"Are you hurt?" He managed.

She shook her head. "Nasty bump on the head from dodging that spell thanks to Auntie Bella,  but otherwise checked out fine at St. Mungo's. Had to check on you, though."

At the mention of Bellatrix's name Remus growled and clutched the t-shirt unconsciously closer and Tonks hurriedly apologized. "I'm sorry Remus, I didn't think."  She paused and squeezed his shoulder. "I'm not going to ask how you're doing because I can't even imagine the pain you're in, though I can see a bit of it." She nodded her head towards the rest of the room they were in and Remus' eyes widened as he took in the destruction visible in every corner; clothing and furniture laying in shambles amidst the broken glass and torn artwork from the walls. 

"Oh shit...I'm sorry—"

Her hand gripped his shoulder more tightly. "Remus stop, it's alright, love."  She assured him. "He was my cousin and I loved him and already miss him, but you and he... you were  _ soulmates _ .  I saw you together so often and no matter how you tried to hide your relationship from some of the others, I know what you meant to each other.  You never hid it from me and I know how much you loved one another."

"He is—w-was... _ everything _ .  Just everything."  The words could barely make it past the rawness in his throat.

Tonks wrapped her arm around his shoulder and pulled him to her, and Remus leaned gratefully into her comforting warmth. "He loved you so much, Remus.  I know you think you're alone now, but you're not. We all care and I'm here, I'm your friend and I want to help you as much as I can. I can't take away the pain, but I can be here for you and try to help you through it."

Remus nodded against her slim shoulder, unable to speak past the pain of his loss coupled with his gratitude for her presence.  Sirius had grown close with his cousin over the last year and the three of them had spent many nights at Grimmauld researching for the Order, as well as enjoying each other's company when time allowed.  He'd formed a solid friendship with the young Auror who seemed to liven any room she was in, even managing to crack some of Sirius' most sullen moods. Many evenings she'd come find them as they poured over research together and try to lighten the dark mood they seemed to be in more often than not thanks to the looming war.  It was true that while he and Sirius never denied their relationship to anyone, they also never flaunted it, and neither thought their rekindled relationship was anyone’s business but theirs. They'd never bothered to hide it from Dora though. She’d actually walked in on them snogging in the library at Grimmauld once, much to Remus' horror and Sirius' amusement.  She'd taken the mickey out of both of them and told them to get a room, to which Sirius had of course replied that he owned the one they were in, thank you very much.

Even the brief thought of that memory had the tears threatening once more and he found himself considering Dora's offer of comfort and friendship, not wanting to wallow alone as he had for so many years after the Potters deaths and Sirius' incarceration. "Thank you." He whispered.

He felt her smile against the top of his head and press a brief kiss to his curls.  "Friends?"

Remus swallowed down his misery for a brief moment and nodded, his eyes closed but the image of Sirius falling through the Veil once again embedded behind his eyelids.  "Friends," he rasped.

Though his heart constantly ached at the loss of the love of his life, Remus threw himself into work for the Order in the following months.  He didn't try to ignore the pain he felt as he did once before, but he tried to rely on his friends in the Order, especially Dora, to help him through the toughest times, and his work aided as a distraction.  He found himself growing closer than before to the younger woman who, true to her word, had become an even dearer friend, and always managed to be there for him when he was at his lowest.

They had been partnered on many missions for the Order as they worked well together and it was on a stakeout mission that things began to change for Remus.  They were hidden in an alley trying to see who came in and out of a nearby building based on a tip they'd received when Remus' enhanced hearing picked up footsteps heading their way and they quickly realized they had nowhere to run to. 

Dora turned to him, her features slightly altering, her hair lengthening and turning dark.  "Trust me?" He nodded, curious as to her plan, and barely had a moment to register what was happening before he was pinned to the wall by her slighter frame, her mouth on his in a fierce kiss.  His arms flailed by his sides and he pushed back against her for a moment before she muttered against his lips, "It's a cover you twat!" 

Remus' mind quickly caught up from the shock of Dora's unexpected kiss and realized what she was doing and he wrapped his arms around her, doing his part to pretend they were just a random couple sharing a heated snog in the darkened alley.  He returned the kiss and he tried to not think that the last person he'd kissed for years had been Sirius, the sharp ache of that thought had him pushing it down. He heard the footsteps grow closer and hesitate near them and he tightened his hold on Dora's waist and deepened the kiss, wanting to appear lost in his partner to the possible Death Eater.  As the footsteps resumed and shuffled past them, Dora let out a small sigh against his lips. 

Remus' brain seemed to short circuit and he suddenly was very aware of the beautiful young woman in his arms, and when her soft lips slanted against his, he stopped thinking altogether.  He pressed slightly closer and parted his lips, emboldened when he felt Dora's tongue slide tentatively against his. For a few moments he completely lost himself in the kiss, the warmth of her body against his and the eager exploration of her mouth.  She pressed her body more firmly into his, her fingers coming up to tangle in his curls and he felt his cock begin to harden against her thigh. 

Realization dawned on him suddenly and he shoved her back and away from him.  His eyes wide as he stared at her, horrified at what he'd just done. Dora stared back at him slightly dazed, lips red and slightly kiss-swollen, panting slightly.  She gathered her wits much more quickly than Remus did and glanced around to make sure they were alone and whispered a quick Homenum Revelio spell. She grabbed his arm and muttered "not now" dragging him him to the safest apparition point.  "Hold on."

Remus felt the pull of apparition and found himself standing in the small sitting room of Dora's flat. "What are we doing here?"

Dora rolled her eyes.  "Well I knew you were about to freak out on me so after I made sure our targets were already gone I brought you to the safest spot I could think of for your meltdown.  So go ahead. Have at it." She sat down on the sofa, crossing her legs and looking up at him expectantly.

He stared at her in shock for a moment, both at her competence and quick thinking, and at how well she knew him, before his mind returned to the horror of what had just happened.  He started to pace the small area. "This just... that was... what the hell was that, Dora?"

"I believe it was called a kiss, Remus."  She grinned, completely unbothered by the dark look he gave her.  "A pretty damn good one too, I might add."

"It was just a cover right?" Remus asked her, running a hand through his hair.  "So no one would think we were spying."

She shook her head slightly, her features and hair once again returning to their normal and she smiled.  "Well, it started that way, yes."

"Dora, I—"

She cut him off.  "Remus, don't give me any bullshit because it may have started as a quick cover, but we  _ both  _ felt it change.  You wanted that kiss as just as much as I did so please don't deny it."

"It was a mistake,  I'm sorry."

Dora stood and walked over to him, her tone gentle.  "Why are you so sure it was a mistake?"

He took a step back to put more distance between them.  "Nothing can ever happen between us."

"Because of Sirius?"

Hearing his name made the constant hole in his chest twinge, and Remus nodded, speaking quietly.  "I still love him, Dora, more than anything."

"Do you think I don't know that?" She asked, her expression still soft.  "I would never try to replace him, Merlin knows my cousin would be a hard act to follow. But you can't deny yourself happiness forever because he's gone now."

"It's only been six months."  Remus bit his lip and shook his head.  "And how horrible is that? You're his  _ cousin _ .  My dead lover's cousin who I just snogged in a dark alley!"

Dora shrugged. "There's a war going on, in case you forgot, Remus.  Any of us could die at any moment. Are we not supposed to want to snatch what happiness we can while we can? Tell me, can you really not think of me as anything other than Sirius' cousin?"

"No, of course not, but—look, I don't know what just happened back there but it can't happen again.  I'm sorry, I got carried away."

She smirked.  "I felt how carried away you were, I don't think it was a mistake."

"Dora!"  Remus felt his face grow hot as Dora just smiled sweetly.  He took a deep breath before continuing. "I know better than anyone that we're in the middle of a war, but I'm not going to have a fling with you because of it."

She smiled at him sadly.  "Remus, please just relax, I'm not going to force myself on you but I am going to be honest with you."

Remus swallowed hard, but nodded.

"I like you, Remus, and I have for a while now.  I know we're friends and that you still and always will love Sirius, but I think we can be good together, if you gave us a chance."  She admitted quietly.

He stood there trying to digest her words, completely taken aback at her confession.  Of course he knew she was beautiful, he'd be blind to not see that, but he'd never thought of her in that way before she had kissed him.  Even with Sirius being gone for six months his heart still belonged to the other man and he couldn't imagine loving anyone the way he'd loved Sirius for most of his life.  If he was really honest with himself though, he had to admit he'd stolen a few glances at her when he thought she wasn't looking, or delighted in making her laugh possibly more than he should have. 

But that didn't mean he liked her as more than a friend, did it?  He just couldn't. He'd enjoyed the kiss of course, he was still a fully functioning male even with his heart in tatters over Sirius, but he couldn't have any feelings for Dora other than friendship, could he?

"I'm so flattered, Dora, I really am," Remus began, his hands worrying a thread on his jumper in his nervousness.  "You're such a lovely woman, but I just can't."

"Is it because I'm a woman?"  She asked bluntly.

Remus sputtered, "No!  No, of course not, I'm actually bisexual, but no, it's nothing to do with that."

"Then what is it?"

"I do find you attractive, but my heart... I can't let go of Sirius even though I know he's gone.  I'll always love him and you deserve to come first in someone's heart and life, Dora. I'm too old, too broken for you."  He admitted.

"Oh Remus, we're all a bit broken, but you're far from old."  She assured him with a gentle smile. "I'm not asking you to marry me, you ridiculous man, and I know you will always love Sirius.  I would never want to change that, but surely you deserve to have someone care for you as well."

"Dora..."

"Just think about it, alright?"  She asked, coming closer and covering his hands with hers.  "Don't deny yourself some happiness because you think you're betraying Sirius' memory.  He would want you to be happy and you know it."

Her words startled him and he looked into her grey eyes, so like Sirius' but yet so different. "I'll think about it," he promised. 

She smiled and stood on tiptoe to press a brief kiss to his mouth and then moved back, squaring her shoulders. "So do you want to send in the report for that useless mission or should I?"

Remus could think of little else but Dora's confession and his own realization that he was attracted to the spitfire of a woman over the next few days.  He felt like he was going crazy over it in some ways, even going so far as to having pretend conversations in his head with Sirius and trying to gauge how he would have reacted to him considering a relationship with his younger cousin. 

He recalled a conversation Sirius and he had several months prior to his death about what would happen if one of them died and he knew Sirius would want him to move on, he'd said so himself, but that didn't make it any easier.  He remembered how Sirius had brought up the topic and he'd grown angry at the thought of losing Sirius again after just getting him back, but Sirius had persisted and told him he didn't want him to be alone again. He had confessed to Sirius how he'd been the twelve years they were forced apart and how he'd had flings, but had never let anyone get close to him.  He knew deep down from Sirius' own reassurances that his lover would want him to be happy even if it was with someone else.

How he'd react if he knew it was his younger cousin he had no idea though. 

He'd also thought about the fact that maybe he was attracted to her because she was similar to Sirius in some ways, but though they were alike in some ways, they differed greatly in many more.  Their age difference and his lycanthropy were other issues he was dealing with though Dora reassured him neither mattered to her. He knew he was a broken, penniless werewolf with little to offer, but for some reason Dora saw so much more in him.  It gave him hope for the first time in ages. 

He agreed to a date to see if she was right and they could be good together, and though his heart raced and ached at even the thought of dating someone other than Sirius, he went and found himself relaxing in her presence all too soon.  Before he knew it they'd been on several dates and the little minx had been right; they complimented each other well and he found himself happier than he'd been in far too long.

They were still living in war-ravaged times and while their relationship might have progressed more slowly under other circumstances, he knew better than most how suddenly love and joy could be taken from them so he relished their time together.  Even as quickly as their relationship grew, he fell in love with her slowly, not even realizing what the feeling was until he saw her throw her head back in laughter at a sarcastic remark he had made one day during an Order meeting and the thought "I love that woman" ran through his mind. 

The realization made his head swim and his heart ache, guilt welling at the thought he was betraying Sirius, and he ended things with her that very night.  She didn't have to tell him how hurt and disappointed she was for he saw it all on her face. He tried to avoid her for a bit, confident that she was better off without him and even though he could practically hear Sirius screaming at him in his head to stop being an utter twat and just be happy already, he couldn't bring himself to admit he loved her when he still felt his entire heart belonged to Sirius. 

It wasn't until after Dumbledore's death and Bill's attack by Greyback that he admitted even to himself that maybe there was room in his life and heart for both of them.  Molly's misguided attempts at pushing them together angered him, but she hadn't been privy to the full nature of his relationship with Sirius so he did his best to ignore her and instead focused on Dora who still wanted to be with him despite his repeated attempts at self-sabotage.

He and Dora talked for hours that night and he confessed not only his feelings, but also his doubts.  She assured him she understood his concerns and in the end they decided to try again and this time he decided to finally give it his all.  He knew he would love Sirius forever, but he finally accepted that he could love them both without betraying or hurting the other. 

The decision to get married was spontaneous, but nonetheless felt right deep in his heart. He knew that the reason he was even a semblance of the man he once had been was thanks to Dora.  Her vibrancy, and the love she showed him, made him feel alive in ways he hadn't felt since his youth and he wanted to spend the rest of his life making her happy. Of course, his doubts of his own worth, so ingrained with his lycanthropy, were not miraculously gone and when Dora confessed she was pregnant the elation he felt was quickly marred with horror and terrible guilt.

He tried to celebrate with her, but he could see she saw through his facade and when he told her after dinner he was going for a walk she gave him a knowing look and kissed him with a warning to be safe.  His subsequent argument with Harry had made his guilt multiply and after leaving Harry, Ron, and Hermione, he found himself in the park near Grimmauld where he'd helped Sirius escape the confines of his ancestral home as Padfoot several times.  He sank down on a bench and tried to clear his thoughts only to find that it wasn't just his doubts as a father or passing on his lycanthropy that plagued him. 

He buried his face in his hands and felt the remorse well up once more for everything he and Sirius would never, could never, have.   _ 'Merlin, Pads,' _ he thought to himself, ' _ I'm going to be a dad.  Me, a father and it's something I know you always wanted.  I remember when Harry was born and how ecstatic you were. You loved and doted on him as if he was yours.  Remember when you said you wanted to have pups with me? Your words not mine, you twat,' _ Remus swallowed past the lump in his throat at the memory.   _ 'Godric, you wanted us to have kids together after the war and you would have been such an amazing father, but now it's me here, about to be a Dad and it's not with you.  I love her, Pads, damn me, but I do. How can I do this without you? It was supposed to be us.' _

He felt the tears well and slide down his cheeks.   _ 'Will I ever be able to let go of the guilt of doing these things without you? We could never get married but here I am married, to your cousin no less, and having the life you wanted for us.  I know you're probably calling me a stupid fool wherever you are and I know you'd want me to be happy, but oh Sirius...you were my happiness for so long that it feels wrong sometimes to be happy without you.  I just... fuck I miss you. I love you, I'll always love you, but...I think I need to let go a bit for now. It's not fair to Dora, it's not fair for our child...our child...' _ Remus swallowed hard again,  _ 'And it's not fair to me either.  You're always going to be a part of me, but I need to be there for my family now and I can't do that if I don't let go of the guilt.  I love you, Sirius, so much.' _

He wiped the tears from his face and apparated back home to his wife who was waiting patiently for him in bed reading a book.  She raised an eyebrow when he entered and smiled. "Feeling better?"

He put all the love he felt for her in a kiss and then laid down next to her, wrapping his arms around her waist and pressing a kiss to her still flat abdomen.  "I love you, the both of you."

She smiled and tangled her fingers in his curls, "We both know that, you ridiculous man."

The day Teddy was born was the happiest of Remus' life.  He could barely contain the joy he felt and gazing at his son for the first time, so small and content nestled in his arms, he knew that he would do anything and everything to protect him and keep him safe.  His heart felt full to bursting with love and he knew that his son would not only have his parents to love and nurture him, but also a special guardian angel watching down over him. He'd never felt Sirius' presence as strongly as he did that day. 

He hated leaving Teddy the night he was called to Hogwarts, but he knew Dora would keep him safe.  He held both his wife and son close before he left, pressing kisses to both their heads. "I'll come back to you both, but no matter what happens, I love you, both of you, so much."

Seeing Dora at the battle almost broke Remus, but he also understood her wanting to fight.  Neither could sit back on the sidelines and they wanted to make the world a safer place for their son who was at least safe at home with his grandmother. 

Remus had dueled and fought in many battles over the course of his life, but he'd never fought harder than he did that night.  The rage he felt when he saw Greyback was nothing compared to when he spotted Bellatrix across the courtyard. His wand arm ached with the speed at which he flung curses, growling as he dueled those in his way trying to get to her.  He spotted Dolohov in his peripheral vision and took out the Death Eater he had been dueling with a flick of his wand only to turn and block the spell Dolohov cast at him.

"Filthy half-breed!" Dolohov sneered, quickly sending another curse his way.

Remus deflected it easily and fired three spells at the Death Eater in quick succession, a grin on his face until he heard the unmistakable high pitched cackle to his left and Bella's taunting cries calling her niece. That moment of distraction was all it took for the purple jet of light to meet its' target and the last thing Remus saw as he fell was Dolohov's twisted grin.

The bright light was blinding even with his eyes shut, but Remus couldn't remember closing his eyes.  He felt a bit disoriented and slowly blinked his eyes open, seeing white columns above him. He sat up slowly, trying to get his bearings, taking in the cavernous room he was in.  The last thing he remembered was dueling Dolohov and he had no idea where he was now.

He stood gingerly, expecting to feel some pain from injuries he must have surely sustained, but it took him a moment to realize he felt fine.  Better than fine actually; he couldn't remember the last time had stood up without his bones creaking in some way. He reached for his side to check where he knew the curse had hit and his eyes widened as he saw his arm—where were his scars?  Remus gasped, eyes scanning each inch of exposed skin, but everything was blemish-free; the scars that littered his body from years of monthly transformations were simply gone. 

"I think I'm going to miss those."

Remus froze.  He knew that voice.  But it couldn't be...

He dropped the hem of his shirt, his jaw clenched and turned around, his breath hitching at the sight before him.  "Sirius?"

The man before him was definitely Sirius, but healthier and more beautiful than he'd seen him in years.  Gone was the emaciated frame and sallow complexion of Sirius' last years. Here he stood, vital and healthy, tall and lithe as he was when they had just turned twenty, his skin a glowing porcelain, the long, ebony hair Remus loved to run his fingers through fell full and luxurious over Sirius' shoulders.  He was clad in his favorite leather jacket and tight jeans, but it was the tender look in his mercurial eyes and the soft smile on his face that brought tears to Remus' eyes. "Sirius, is that really you?"

Sirius crossed the small distance between them and pulled Remus into his arms, his voice muffled in the crook of Remus' neck. "Moony, oh Godric I've missed you."

The scent of leather, tobacco and citrus enveloped Remus and he could only hold Sirius tighter as he realized this was real, that  _ Sirius  _ was real, here in his arms.  He couldn't hold back the tears and Sirius pulled back slightly to wipe them softly from his cheeks.  "No tears, love, I'm here, I'm real and so are you."

Remus could only stare at him in awe and trace the beloved features of his face with his eyes, taking in every minute detail of the man he loved.  He raised one shaking hand and ran it down the contours of Sirius' cheekbone and down to his jaw, his thumb grazing the plump lower lip. "Pads...it's really you."

Sirius smiled gently. "I'm here, love, I'm really here." 

He pressed his mouth to Remus' in a soft kiss and Remus felt his entire body relax, one hand tangled in Sirius' hair and the other gripping his waist, the only thought in his mind that he was finally home, here in his love's arms, on his lover's lips. 

Sirius pulled back from the lingering kiss and rested his forehead against Remus'. "We don't have much time before the others get here, love, so we need to talk, alright? We have forever for this, for us."

Slightly confused, Remus nodded and let Sirius lead him to a bench, their hands entwined, and they sat down close together, both wanting as little distance between them as possible. 

"What others, Pads?"

Smiling sadly at him, Sirius prodded.  "What do you remember, love?"

Remus searched his mind and the thought he'd had upon waking in this place returned. "Dolohov killed me, didn't he?"

Sirius nodded, biting his lip.  "I'm so sorry, Re. You had so much to live for."

Remus' eyes widened, horror dawning as he realized what he'd forgotten in his joy at seeing Sirius.  "Teddy! Dora... oh Merlin... Sirius, I have to—"

"Shh, it's alright, Moons, there's nothing you can do now." Sirius wrapped an arm around his shoulders.  "Teddy is going to be fine. He's going to grow up happy and safe in a world without Voldemort, surrounded by people who love him."

"You mean... we won?" he asked incredulously.

Sirius nodded.  "We did. Thanks to Harry in the end of course, but that's for later."

"Dora then, she'll— "

"She'll be along shortly, Moons."  The look in Sirius' eyes confirmed Remus' worst fear.

He closed his eyes and took a steadying breath.  "She's dead then too. Teddy... he won't have either of us."

"I'm sorry, Re, you deserved to see your son grow up with both his mother and father, but I promise you, Teddy will have so many people to tell him all about you both and he's going to be fine."

Remus nodded, swallowing down the doubts in his mind.  For some reason he knew deep down Sirius' words were correct and that his son would be alright, happy and loved. 

"Sirius—"

"Before you start what I know you're going to say I want to tell you to stop, alright?"

Remus bit his lip and shook his head, "You don't know what I was going to say."

Sirius smirked.  "So it wasn't some load of tripe about how you feel guilty about marrying Tonks and forgetting me?  Because I can assure you, Moonbeam, I know you didn't forget me."

He smiled sheepishly at Sirius and rolled his eyes.

"Look, Re, I always wanted you to be happy.  Do I wish we had the opportunity when we were alive to have a family together and get married ourselves? Of course I do, but I watched you, you know?  We can do that from here if we want to and Merlin did I watch you go through hell at first." Sirius admitted. "Tonks brought you back to life, Re, and I'm so grateful.  She made you happy and you love her and she loves you. How could I not want the man I love to be happy?"

"Oh Sirius."  Remus pressed a kiss to his soft lips, his heart aching with love.

Sirius smiled at him, his hand cupping Remus' cheek. "She made you happy, Moons, and I'm so glad for it.  She gave you Teddy and he is just so beautiful and I'm so proud of you. Your son is just amazing, love. It's all I ever wanted for you and I wish I had been able to give you a family myself, but the fact you had the chance with her and you took it means the world to me."

"I felt you there the day he was born, were you, were you really there?" 

"Of course I was."  Sirius beamed. "We all were actually.  I was over your shoulder making faces at Teddy, not that the little stinker could see of course." 

"All?" 

Sirius cocked his head, his smile soft.  "Ted was there, of course. Had to see his grandson, you know.  James and Lily too."

Remus swallowed, his eyes filling with tears again.  "James and Lily?"

"The newest Marauder was being born, do you really think Prongs would miss that?" Sirius teased, his thumb caressing Remus' cheek. "Lily kept cooing at him and saying how much he looked like you, lucky kid.  You'll see them both soon, love, I promise. We just thought it be best I meet you first."

Remus nodded and closed his eyes briefly, his heart full at the prospect of seeing his friends again. He leaned into Sirius' warmth, relishing the feel of his stubbled cheek next to his own and overwhelmed with peace and contentment. 

No matter how happy he was in that moment, one question loomed in his mind that he couldn't help asking. "What happens now, Pads?"

Sirius' eyebrows knit together in confusion. "What do you mean, Moons?"

"With Dora.  Once she gets here...I'm married, Pads."

"That's entirely up to you, love." Sirius smiled tenderly, his grey eyes fathomless as they bore into Remus'. "I meant it when I said I want you to be happy.  I'll still be here, always be here for you no matter how you want me. If you want to be with your wife then I'll be the best friend by your side."

"Well I guess death matured you well, cousin."

They both looked up at the new voice and Remus saw Dora standing there, so beautiful and happy hand in hand with her father, Ted.  He stood and immediately crossed to her, wrapping his arms around her tightly. "Oh Dora..."

"Shhh, love, it's alright.  Teddy's safe." She whispered, her hands rubbing soothing circles on his back. 

He pulled back and looked at her, nodding.  "Without us though."

"Andy will make sure he's cared for and will know everything about the both of you."

Remus smiled at his father-in-law, happy to see the kind man. "Hello, Ted.  I know she will."

Ted enveloped him in a hug of his own, patting his shoulder afterwards. "Thank you for giving me a beautiful grandson."

"Oi, I don't get a hello here, little cousin?"  Sirius teased from behind Remus.

Tonks rolled her eyes, but immediately jumped into Sirius' outstretched arms. "Selfless and yet still a git, I see."  She laughed as he twirled her around in a circle.

Sirius set her down gently and winked. "Can't teach an old dog too many new tricks."

Tonks laughed again and then turned to Remus, her hand outstretched. He grasped her hand and she smiled.  "I couldn't help overhearing your conversation when we arrived, love."

"Dora—"

She quieted him with a raised eyebrow. "Remus, we promised until death do us part, do you remember that?"  At Remus' nod, she continued, "We're dead, love. I know you loved me and you still do, I never doubted that for a moment.  You loved me so well and you gave me the best gift anyone could ask for, our beautiful son. But Remus, you belong with Sirius.  _ He's  _ your forever."

Remus could only stare at her silently, marveling at her capacity to love so completely. "I don't know what to say. I love you, Dora, how—"

She smacked his arm lightly, "Oh you ridiculous man, stop thinking so much.  Don't think I'm going anywhere! You might be with Sirius as you deserve to be, but you're both stuck with me and I still have forever to annoy you."

"As if you could ever annoy me." She quirked her brow again and Remus laughed.  "Alright, maybe your singing." He kissed her cheek. "Thank you, Dora, you're the most amazing woman I've ever known."  Her smile was radiant and she took her father's hand once more.

"Well since we've established we have forever here, maybe we could get a move on and get going to our final destination then?" Sirius asked, coming to stand next to Remus.

Remus looked around again, still trying to decipher where they were. "Where are we anyway?"

Sirius grinned and inclined his head, "What does it look like?"

"I'd say it looks like King's Cross, but I've never seen it look this clean in my life." Tonks shrugged.

Now that she'd said it, Remus could tell immediately that's where they were.  It was stark white and void of any other people, but he could see it plainly now and as he thought this a train pulled in stopping at the track nearest them. 

Sirius laced his fingers through Remus' bringing his hand up to kiss the back of Remus'. "Are you ready, love?"

Remus nodded just as he heard another voice call out from the direction of the train.  "Are you done hogging Moony or do I have to wait another few years here?"

Eyes wide Remus turned to see both James and Lily standing at the entrance to the train, both young and beautiful, huge smiles lighting both their faces.  He started walking towards them, tears flowing freely once more as Lily came running to him and threw herself into his arms. 

"Oh Remus!" She cried, her arms tight around his neck. "I've missed you so much."

Remus held her tightly, barely believing this was Lily in his embrace.  "You have no idea, Lils, no idea."

She pulled back to gaze into his face, her green eyes bright with tears.  She cupped his cheek gently, "Thank you for taking care of Harry as best you could."

Remus nodded, his lower lip trembling.  "He's amazing, Lils. Just like you."

"And I still have to wait even longer because of my own wife."  James groaned.

Remus laughed, letting go of Lily and wiping the tears from his face before facing James.  "Prongs, you never change, do you?"

James grinned, ruffling his hair and shrugging.  "Would you want me to?"

Remus shook his head and pulled James in for a hug.  "Never."

Just then the whistle sounded and Sirius clapped both of them on the back.  "Alright boys, it's time to go. You can keep being mushy on the train, alright?"

James released Remus and wiped his own cheeks, adjusting his glasses.  "I've missed you, Moony, you don't know what it's been like trying to control this one without you around."

Remus laughed and followed them onto the train, his hand once more firmly encased in Sirius'.  "I can only imagine, Prongs."

They all settled comfortably into a compartment, Remus' heart lighter than he could ever remember it being.  Sirius nudged Remus' shoulder, nodding at James and Lily, entwined on the seat in front of them next to Dora and Ted.  "Moony, Padfoot, and Prongs together again."

James inclined his head, his smile wide. "'Til the very end."

The train lurched into motion and Remus leaned against Sirius, his head resting against his love's shoulder. He had no idea where they were headed, but as long as they were together all was well. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Reviews are love. <3
> 
> Follow me on Tumblr at JenCala


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